Prioritize Your Needs & Stop Hating Everything

A dirty and partially broken mirror sits on the floor propped between a wall and a counter. It reflects a wadded up paper towel, the carpet, and the tile flooring.

Let's be honest: it's really easy to hate everything and everyone when you're tired, hungry, and haven’t been taking care of yourself. Our bodies start shutting out everything and everyone in efforts to get us to focus on whatever that need is. We don't always interpret these signs, though: suddenly everyone is more annoying and we hate everything around us.

I know I don't need to tell you everyone needs food, water, and sleep to survive and thrive. That's a given and knowing isn't a problem.

The problem is our society tells us taking care of ourselves is negotiable.

Many western and eastern cultures alike value productivity. Falling asleep in a meeting in Japan is seen as positive, because it means you're working so hard and sacrificing your own needs to the benefit of the company. Even casually in the United States, it's expected that sleeping and eating is a fair trade off when you have too much on your plate. But we only do our best work when we take care of ourselves!

Taking care of yourself is non-negotiable.

When you make your priorities, getting adequate sleep, water, food, physical activity are non-negotiable. The number one non-negotiable is safety. This means physical safety, emotional safety, and psychological safety. This includes where you live, where you work, and your relationships.

How does your schedule and list of to-dos look when you've prioritized your non-negotiables? What changes? What becomes more an option than a necessity? Are there feelings that come up about valuing yourself? As always, working to prioritize yourself is a process. Find friends who are doing the same work, and don't be afraid to reach out for extra support when you need it. Let me know if this is a process you'd like me to support you through.

Stephanie Bloodworth, LMFT-A